Back to the Mothership

Yesterday it was almost 60F degrees out on February 20th. I swear, it was Mother Nature's way of telling us to hang on, Spring is coming! Of course I packed up the dog and my little art journal (just in case) and headed over to the closest Forest Preserve/big park. We both needed to get out of the house and into the sunshine for a little walk. My back patio is still in the shade for a few more months.

Ruby had a VERY muddy walk, sometimes sloshing through an inch of water over the gravel trail. Her fur hanging down off her belly was soaked and muddy. Then there was the squirrel she HAD to chase through a couple inches of soggy mud, dragging me behind her.

So we HAD to sit on a bench in the sunshine (and on pavement) so she could dry off before getting into my car. Because guess who forgot a towel? We sat for about an hour in the sun. I had a lot of stuff to do at home, but I swear I couldn't move off that bench.

We people watched. We lake watched. The lake was defrosting, visible tracks in the ice were turning into sloshy shorelines. I watched as a parent sat and LET her children play on the soggy cracking ice.

I sat on the bench and watched people strolling by. Mostly middle aged couples walking hand in hand, talking quietly, or in comfortable silence. A young couple, he with a big blanket, she with an old fashioned picnic basket, talking about kayaking. Another young couple pushing a stroller with a very young baby in it. They were tired looking, she was a larger girl, who looked determined in her leggings and athletic shoes, to get some exercise. And he tenderly put his arm around her and leaned into her in such a sweet loving gesture, it brought tears to my eyes. He clearly loved her, just the way she was.

I want to be loved like that.

Observing, watching people walking by, I have never felt so disconnected from the world. Normally getting out and being in public makes me feel the opposite, like I am part of humanity. But yesterday it was different. I wasn't part of the world, I was looking at it as an observer, like an alien, taking notes in my head for when I report back to the Mothership. It was weird. It made me sad. Lonely.

I think maybe if I wasn't tethered to my 68 lb dog by a leash, I would have floated away, right then and there. And *poof* disappear among the clouds.

It's back to normal today, a "real-feel" of 35F degrees. Back to February.

Till next time...